Self-love. A topic that was completely unexplored on social media a few years ago is now conquering Instagram stories and posts of various influencers. But what is self-love and how do I, as a blogger, deal with it?
From perfectionism to self-love
Times change and so does the content on Instagram. While people used to be very concerned about looking perfect and strived for absolute perfectionism in everything they did, this is fortunately different now. People on social media are starting to consciously accept their flaws and quirks (more) and are now questioning influencers’ posts a lot more.
I have the feeling that perfectionism is pretty much out of date. While a few years ago it was all about showing a perfect body and presenting a perfect life, it is now more about authenticity, realism, and honesty. These topics are also reflected in the Instagram posts of the influencers. They show, for instance, that it is normal for people to suffer from cellulite or for a body to have scars, stretch marks, and dimples. After all, a body is not a machine and life does not go by without leaving a mark.
What is self-love actually?
The topic of self-love is wide-ranging. Self-love is much more than loving yourself; it is a way of life. Self-love is often paired with self-esteem, self-respect, and self-confidence. These terms are linked to one another. Without one, the other does not exist. If you want to build self-love, you should first work on your acceptance of yourself. However, that does not automatically mean that you have to be satisfied with everything you are or have. If, for example, you want to change your body because you no longer feel comfortable with your weight, then the change should come about of your own free will and not because it is an Instagram trend to be slim.
It is important not to look outwards and ask yourself “What do others do? or “How much do other people weigh?”, but to work with your own conditions. Every body is different and we cannot change certain body characteristics. This is where acceptance comes into play. The concept of self-love is based on accepting oneself and one’s conditions – be it body size, build, eye colour, etc. – and learning to make the best of these circumstances. You do not have to emulate top models with seemingly ideal measurements. Your own potential is in yourself; you just have to recognise it and learn to enjoy it.
Self-love on Instagram
The mood on Instagram has changed significantly in recent years. Although there is still a small portion characterised by discrimination and hate, it has become significantly less. In the past, people used to say things like “Why do you dress like that with such a figure?” Nowadays it is more like “Wow, you look great and I like the way you feel about your body!”. There have been many beauty ideals over the years. I think since 2019, the beauty ideal has been just to be who you are.
I get a lot of messages from women, but also men, telling me how happy they are about the honest and authentic content on my profile. It gives them courage and strengthens their self-confidence when they see honest pictures of influencers. As an influencer, I feel obliged to use my reach to show that there is no such thing as a perfect body or a perfect life, which unfortunately is still often made out to be the case. Even superstars like Beyonce or Lady Gaga often have doubts about their looks, skills, and about their lives. No one is infallible. But I am glad that the media has awakened a bit in this regard and is now gradually reporting more honestly and openly about such topics.
Learn to love yourself
Strong self-confidence and self-esteem make you independent, free and you automatically stand taller in life. It may take some time to build self-worth, but the journey is definitely worth it. I will now share with you my 5 favourite tips on learning to love yourself:
1. Inside or outside?
You want to lose weight because you just don’t feel as comfortable in your body as you used to. So far so good. But ask yourself first: Do you really want to do it out of deep conviction and because you’ve wanted to do something for yourself and your health for a long time, or do you want to do it because you just spent an hour on Instagram and everyone looks slimmer than you? Question yourself and your decisions. Often our actions are not based on our actual desires but are influenced from the outside because we feel that we have to live up to a certain ideal. But here’s a secret: You don’t have to at all!
2. Give yourself compliments
We spend hours on social media every day. We scroll through feeds and look at Instagram stories from influencers and celebrities. Thoughts like “wow, she´s got great skin” or “her stomach looks great” often go through our heads. Why not start with yourself? Write down 5 things that you particularly like about yourself. It is easier for us to give compliments to others than to ourselves because we are much more critical when it comes to our own selves.
3. You can do it!
All of us have had to take an important exam or prove ourselves in a job interview. Positive thoughts help put what you want into action. Encourage yourself and believe in yourself and your plans. Remind yourself of the things you have achieved so far. Do not think about what you have not achieved, but about what you have been able to achieve so far and praise yourself for it. Give yourself credit for your accomplishments.
4. Respect, respect, respect
If you do not respect yourself, how are others supposed to do it? Deliberately set (other people) boundaries and suggest to them what you accept and what you do not. This is especially important in relationships and friendships. You decide how other people are allowed to treat you.
5. Don’t compare yourself
People often want to be someone else. I always ask myself: What for? Everyone has unique qualities and characteristics that no one else has. That is something you should be proud of. Don’t you think so?
You don’t learn self-confidence, self-love, and self-respect in one day. But investing time in yourself and your development is definitely worth it. It is commendable when you take a step every day and bit by bit stop comparing yourself to others or emulating other people. This way you will lead a more relaxed and peaceful life and at the same time, you will be more stable in everyday life. As you can see, it is worth it. If you want to learn more about self-love, you can of course also follow me on Instagram. I would be very happy 🙂
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